Seeing stars on the inside of my eyelids

Seeing stars on the inside of my eyelids,
dreaming of spinning through galaxies upside down,
discussing the meaning of words with an alien named Bob.

harsh. fear. eons.
Bob says it's their problem.

Hurtling toward sparkly space dust and debris,
light-years blinding as they speed by.

young. old. lollipop.
Bob says he's confused, as a gift.

Creating comets by twirling shiny batons,
undiscovered planets whispering secrets,
super nova exploding, wormhole beckoning.

color. black. existence.

Burnout

Volcano heat boils into the sky

flying cinders burn holes in clouds

lava runs lethargically
down mountainsides

bubbles of hot frustration
devour intestines
through restless nights

spewing ash and bile and exhaustion
 

Sports Commentary Part 3 (Really!)

People who know me are wondering right now “wait, she’s writing another post about SPORTS?”

Here are the first two:

Part 1:

http://itsgotsomethingtodowithjaneausten.blogspot.com/2013/01/sports-commentary_22.html

Part 2:

http://itsgotsomethingtodowithjaneausten.blogspot.com/2013/02/cute-boys-in-shorts-sports-commentary.html

At the end of the second part, I mentioned that since I like Australian rules football there’s a possibility that I might like rugby.

A few weeks later I was scrolling through the TV menu and noticed a Six Nations game on one of the sports channels (or BBC America, who knows), which is a little odd because I never look at the sports channels. At first I wondered if six nations referred to six different native American tribes competing against each other (Cherokee v. Iroquois, for example). Then I realized that it meant six countries outside the U.S.

 

Oh right.

It was actually a rugby match between two countries that I don’t remember, though I think one was Ireland, because I remember it being Brian O’somebody’s last match.

My comments to the dog ran something like this:

"What are they doing? Ouch- that looked like it hurt. Why are they all bunched up pushing against the group from the other team…oh my goodness does that guy know where his face is right now- oh wait where’d the ball go this time?"

And if I’m honest, there may have been a “he’s a bit hot” comment or two.

 

But I watched the entire game from when I started, which is about ¾ of the game. It’s fast and rough, the ball is constantly moving, and there’s very little downtime. 

So this past Saturday morning, I decided to avoid schoolwork and see if I could learn anything about rugby instead. I stumbled upon a BBC sports page, which had a tab for both rugby league and rugby union. Not knowing the difference, I decided to start with picking teams.  Seemed logical at the time, or at least more fun than schoolwork. And, of course, I picked them for reasons that make sense only to me.

 

 

pic from Catalan online shop

I decided to start with rugby league, just because. After looking at the team names, I picked the Dragons, mostly because I think dragons are cool. Then I realized that the Catalan Dragons are from France, where presumably my family has some heritage based on my last name. Plus I took 4 years of French in high school, not that I remember much of it nor have I encountered situations where I need to use it.  This team is the odd one out in the Super Rugby League since they are the only team in the league not from the British Isles, and I tend to like oddballs.  Also, they are relatively new to the league, and I am new to rugby. Seemed like a match to me.  I don’t really like their colors (red and yellow), but they make sense for fire-breathing dragons.Then I visited their online shop, where I found this little guy in the picture. It's out of stock, and would be expensive to ship, but I want it.



pic from Quins online shop

Then I switched to the rugby union teams. I started with the Dragons, since it would be easiest to just keep the mascots the same, but the colors/uniforms/website didn’t appeal to me. I looked at several other team websites and eventually decided to click on the Harlequins site. First, I liked the colors and the patterns of the uniforms. Then I remembered that a character dressed as a harlequin features in a Tommy and Tuppence short story by Agatha Christie, and in a Father Brown story by G.K. Chesterton. Sold. Being able to pick a sports team based on literary references? Priceless.

 

(of course, it’s also the name of a line of rather cheesy romance novels, but that’s beside the point)



pic from Quins online shop



Oh, and the difference betwen league and union seems to be the amount of players and the rules. Or something like that.

 

After I had my teams picked I then tried to find where I can actually watch rugby matches. Anything to avoid schoolwork, after all.

Turns out I picked a sport which isn’t that easy to watch in the U.S. I found some apps to download that will show the live streaming matches online, but they looked pretty sketchy.  I then found Club Rugby TV from Australia. I watched half a game, enough  to hear one of the announcers state “well, something just happened”, which is my kind of sports commentary, before I realized that all the games listed were from over a year ago.

There evidently is a specific TV channel that shows the matches here in the U.S. called Fox Soccer Plus. I found a list of British or Irish pubs that show that channel constantly. Since I have been a collector of avid non-sports fans for friends (how else can I avoid being invited to watch the Super Bowl every year?), the conversations went a little like this: “Hey you want to go hang out at a pub for a couple of hours with me while I watch a rugby game?” which met a confused look and a “say what?” from them.  I also checked the closest sports bar, which is supposedly either Scottish or Irish and mostly known for the female wait staff dressed in little shirts and short plaid skirts that are evidently supposed to resemble kilts. They only show baseball, basketball, and UFC.

So I broke down and called my cable provider, and the conversation went like this:

me- “So I don’t like sports. I just want to watch rugby and Australian rules football. I don’t want the other sports channels. Is it possible to just add Fox Soccer Plus?”

 

him- “Of course. let me check.” Hold music. Then: “it’s (insert outrageous price here) for a season.”

me (considering hyperventilating)- “How long is a season?”

 

him- “Well, there’s the premiership, and the Heineken cup…..let me check.” Hold music. then: “That price is for a whole year.”

me-“ I’ll think about it.”

 

pic from Catalan twitter feed

Once I was off the phone and calmed down, I figured out that the cost per month would not be any more than the price of the drinks/meals at the pubs if I were to watch the matches there. I would need to pay for the whole year up front though. After keeping an eye on the Fox Soccer Plus schedule, I also realized that it doesn't correlate with what's actually being played. For example, the Catalan Dragons are playing Hull KR on June 22. Fox Soccer Plus is showing a match from the previous day by different teams. The following week the channel is showing a Dragons match, but it is one from over a month ago. Plus the Australian rules football is shown in the wee hours of the morning over here, when I am sound asleep hopefully not snoring. I'm just not sure I can justify paying for this channel.



I did manage to find a legitimate website to watch the Australian National Rugby League matches, and another which posts the rugby union Aviva premiership matches 3 hours after the end of the match, so I can watch those the next time it comes around. I’ve watched a couple of Quins games from this year's premiership that way. I’m hoping the Heineken cup matches will be available on the official website (the Quins are in pool 4). I don’t mind watching them after the fact, as that means I can watch them on my own schedule (even if I had the Fox Soccer Plus channel I’d have to watch the Australian matches afterward anyway). I just want to watch them.